The Right To Be

First things first: we just want to wish all and sundry a very Happy Chinese New Year!  May the year of the Rabbit bring everyone joy, good health and prosperity and some rockin' ink!

EK:

We've fielded a few requests before and just after the first two days of CNY to do a few tats, and some of them were made to mark a new phase in life, particularly after having come through a difficult one.

Speaking of having a difficult time, I'd like to highlight a sector of Malaysian society who often, if not always, never had it easy -- the marginalised and misunderstood transexuals of this country. It is particularly difficult for the men-to-women transgender folk colloquially called Mak Nyah.

US Skin Grafx is sponsoring tattoo prizes this Saturday, at a fundraiser held right around the corner of the shop, at MAP@KL at Solaris Dutamas, to help raise some money to help Mak Nyahs. Friends new and old, readers, whoever you are, are more than welcome and indeed, encouraged to come and lend a little help at this event, which will feature punk rockers, indie music, poetry readings and an auction featuring tattoo prizes (from us!!!) 

NOTE: More details on the event at the bottom of this blog post. Don't miss it!!!! COME TO THE EVENT LAH!!!

I found out about Justice for our Sisters festival via a Facebook post from my old friend, the activist, curator, writer and arts supporter, the dashing-and-articulate Mr. Pang Khee Teik of the Annexe Gallery in Central Market.

Back in the USA, we fairly regularly contributed vouchers and gift certs to help benefit Greystone Ranch, a wildlife rescue ranch and sanctuary, a local community club and various support groups. Randy mentioned that we should help out for this transgender fundraiser, and I asked him why.

"Because," my husband replied, "they are just trying to be themselves and express who they are without fear or favour. That's hand-in-hand with what tattoos are all about. Freedom of self-expression and the right to be who you are - straight, gay, bi, trans, whatever. People are people.  Isn't that why we do what we do as artists?" 

After emailing organisers Angela and Thilaga with my proposal, I took a couple of days to reflect upon this event. I came to realise that we're doing this not just to help out a good cause.  We all have friends who might, one day in the future, benefit in more ways than one from everyone's efforts today.

I was a teenager when I met my first Mak Nyah. Mum found a new hairdresser who had just quit a large saloon in Petaling Jaya. He worked out of a house, and did a really good job. More importantly (as my parents were saving up every spare penny to for their kids to study overseas), he was cheap. "His name's Charlie (not the real name).  He's slightly cha boh heng (effeminate) but don't let that deter you. He'll look at your face and figure and recommend what's best for you. I'm definitely happy with my hair," she said that to other relatives and friends.

A few of my aunts went to him, and so did I. Charlie greeted clients in flamboyant clothes -- harem pants, colourful tops. In time, the cut of his clothes became softer and he dared to use make-up. One time, he met one of my aunts in full make up, a fresh manicure, a bustier and silk skirt. She got her hair done, then relayed the experience gleefully to me. In turn, I relayed the incident (gleefully, too) to my mother.

To my surprise, mum chided me. "You don't need to say things like that," she said a bit roughly. Mum was a lot more understanding to what Charlie was going through. Then she added, "He's not had it easy.  As a little boy, his father beat him and scolded him because he would rather play with dolls than football with the rest of the boys. Today, he doesn't speak to anyone but his mother because everyone else in his family won't accept him. By the way, he hasn't seen his family in 8 years, even though he has been sending money back regularly. They accept the money, but they won't accept him."

Later, I was to discover that Charlie often confided in Mum about the mental agony he experienced in being born with physical attributes that he was not in sync with. How he was ostracised by schoolfriends, family members and suchlike when he decided to be himself (they thought he was sick/unnatural/possessed etc). The way he threw himself into every relationship he had because he thought he was so lucky to find a man who would

accept him -- or her --- for who he/she was. The way some of these men would return the favour by sponging off with free meals, nice gifts (clothes/watches/colognes etc) and borrowing money (which was never returned).

Charlie changed his gender and his name. Not legally (for laws still do not allow that). "But you can call me Cheryl" (again, not the real name). After a few years of being Cheryl, she took the big step: she worked like a madwoman to save money for the operation.  And when she had enough for it, she booked herself an appointment and a return plane ticket. When she returned home, she was an anatomically-correct, truly complete Cheryl.

Cheryl's story has a happy ending. She met a nice man, and married him in a lavish ceremony. By the way, her family reconciled with her. Hard to not give face to friends, in the face of a truly happy bride who worked and fought for what she wanted, and after many hardships, got what she wanted.

She now lives abroad, and we hope, happily. We wish her well. This is a true story.

Not everyone has a happy ending or has found it, however. In recent times, many have faced gross abuse and persecution from people around them. They've been steadily discriminated against for years. In my previous careers, I've met transgender individuals who go through this, and are forced to lead double lives or hide who they are for fear of being treated badly.

They face up to society's BS with a mixture of defensive scorn, bitterness and dignity. I think many of they have greater strength and perserverance than a great many of the rest of us who are born with the equipment we're perfectly happy with.

I just wanted to note that a number of my transgender friends mother-hen'ed me, to my initial surprise. "Lose some weight, la, you'll be so much prettier". "You already got a bust, you no need to take hormone injection, you make the best of the rest la". "Better put some lipstick on, you look tired. Last night never sleep is it???," were some of the memorable quips I received.

.I'm neither a bleeding heart nor an activist; but I strongly believe that a person has a right to be who they are, so long as they aren't directly harming anyone, what does it matter?

BACK TO THE EVENT: Justice For the Sisters festival is held from 2pm to 10pm at Solaris Dutamas's MAP@KL, block A5 (about where Kencana Petroleum is at), 1, Jalan Dutamas 1, 50480 Kuala Lumpur on SATURDAY, Feb 12, 2011.

Entry to the event is via donation at the door. From 2pm to 4pm, entry is RM10 to watch acts like Jeannys&The Melody, Chill please!, Corporate Youth, Kaptain, The Fays and Swampy Zombie Fever.

Following an hour-long break, the next run of shows  is from 5pm to 7pm, and is priced at RM15, featuring acts like Dung, Elektrikasyok (Elaine Foster), Furniture, Furious George + Operasi Sabo, Illya Sumanto, Krisis Halusinasi, Priya K and Think! Tadpole! Think!
Part of the show  (in the evening, it has been told) will be hosted by amazon goddess and local drag icon, SHELAH, who would surely be helping to rev up the crowd in her own inimitable way. SHELAH hosts the 8pm to 10pm show, featuring Dara Othman, Davina Goh, Ferns, Kathleen Choo, KG, Meichern, Nabila Nasir, PT's Angels, Reza Salleh, Sheena, Tanjong, Tshiung Han See.  Chi Too & the Buka Kolektif will also make an appearance at
the event.

While door prices have been specified, guests and visitors are also encouraged to donate more if they so wish in order to support the cause.  I believe (And will confirm in an update on Facebook and/or here) US Skin Grafx tattoo prizes will be auctioned at the 5pm to 7pm slots, and 8pm to 10pm slots.

Justice for Sisters is a human rights campaign, done at the grassroots level. It is organised by concerned members of the public to raise awareness about issues surrounding violence and persecution against the Mak Nyah community in Malaysia. The campaign also aims to raise funds amounting to RM50,000 to finance court cases that have recently been brought up against transgenders currently charged by the Syariah Court. This is the second

such Justice for Sisters event. The inaugural one was held successfully at the Annexe Gallery in Central Market a few weeks ago.

If you can't make it to the festival but would like to donate to the fund or help in other ways, please contact Angela [angela@kryss.org] or Thilaga [thilaga.sulathireh@gmail.com] or let us know via e-mail (us.skin.grafx@gmail.com) so we can help you liaise with them.

THANK YOU FOR READING AND WE HOPE TO SEE YOU THERE!!!!